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I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
