You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
