i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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