she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Randomize