I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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