so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize
