Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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