Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize