I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
