my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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