This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
