btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
