My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
