I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
