my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize