You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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