You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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