My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
