So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
