I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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