What tipped you off? The sombrero?
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Randomize
