I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize