Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
