after a month anything with tits is on the radar
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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