how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
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