Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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