Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize
