sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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