Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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