I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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