Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Blood and glitter go together right?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
