Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I just blew my weed a kiss
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
