Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
