Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize