Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize