so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
