I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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