are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
