College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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