she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
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