I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
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