Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Do vagina's smell?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
