He felt like a one man threesome
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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