But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
