oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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