WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
