The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize