i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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