my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
