I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
