Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
My penis needs a shock collar
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
